Staying Home vs Working

I’ve been home with Olivia for a while and I have to say that I am really liking it.

When I started going back to work after my maternity leave, to a job a loved, I was doing just fine. When we found an amazing daycare in LA that loved our little girl just as much as we did, I was more than okay. However, about a month before we were called to move, my heart started to ache as I let her go to day care. They would send us pictures and videos through out the day and that helped immensely, but I couldn’t shake that feeling.

One night, Myke came back from putting her down and I just started crying. I had a few too many nights of coming home while Myke was putting her down and I had said I would always be home at least by bath time. I knew I wasn’t going to be perfect, but I had done it one too many times. I had this burden on me to “bring home the bacon”  that I had put on myself and all I wanted to do was hold my baby girl.

When the move was decided, we both started the job search. I had found a few jobs I liked and applied for, but then we had the other surprise come up…the baby surprise that is. Since I had been in the recruiting world, I knew that this wouldn’t help my chances, but it wouldn’t count me out of a job. We had hired a few women who had revealed they were pregnant and no one was ever bothered by it. If you’re right for the job, you’re right for the job. With all of that being said, my heart started to ache again. Leaving Olivia was hard enough, but ANOTHER baby. I revealed my feelings to Myke and he very sweetly said that if we move some things around we could possibly make it work for me to stay home. With all of that said-I’m not never going to work again, that’s not me. I just feel like my time right now is better spent with Olivia and getting ready for baby number two.

There are good days and bad days, but overall, I wouldn’t change my time with her for anything in the world.